Posts tagged Film Review

Tomb Raider follows Lara Croft and she goes on a journey or adventure to obtain this artefact which gives the possessor the ability to control time. The film establishes that the planets are coming into alignment an event which occurs only every 5000 years. The Illuminati seek to obtain a treasure which will give the person power to control time, however, this artefact must be recovered before the planets align. Lara Croft sets out to gain this relic for herself to stop it falling into the hands of someone dangerous who could use it to potentially destroy the world. So I’ve got to say I have a major dislike for these films and watching this one over reaffirmed my beliefs that Tomb Raider is both a terrible action film and a terrible adaptation. For starters Angelina Jolie, I can’t stand her as Lara Croft. Often I think she’s a terrible actress too often looking like a prissy stuck up cow, like get the rod out your ass love! anyway her acting ability is almost always mediocre and I don’t think she’s a good actress in this film. I don’t think she’s the right person to depict Lara Croft. She doesn’t even seem anything like Lara Croft, I just can’t believe in her as a character. Secondly the story, it’s just boring. It’s like they tried too hard with all the action, it’s just constructed in such a way it seem overtly artificial. And with like a shower scene within the first 5 minutes sure I expected there would be one but it’s timing seems so odd. It just makes all men or gamers seem really perverted. I’m fine with shower scenes just make it a bit more relevant or time fitting. I really dislike this film, I can’t seem to find anything good about it. I can’t even take Daniel Craig seriously in this film, I love him as James Bond but seriously why was his acting so insanely terrible in this. It really makes no sense to me. Just don’t watch this film seriously, it should be avoided.

Okay so this is not going to be the best review ever because I didn’t really pay attention to the film but that is also a good thing. This film was so bad it couldn’t even hold my attention! It was so boring not even the great Matthew Lillard can keep me engrossed this film. So yeah end of review. If only I could end it there. So anyway I better give you the run-down of what the film is about. So the film is set around a war between the Terran Confederation and the Kilrathi. Unfortunately the Kilrathi are set to invade Earth, and Earth’s only hope is the battle ship the Tiger Claw and the pilots on board. So that is essentially the plot.

The film was awfully boring, I at least watched pretty much all of the previous films I’ve reviewed but this one, it was just not possible. Everything around the film was generally bad like scripting and effects. It’s just a poor excuse of a film. The characters are not exactly well built during this text there very one-dimensional which is a shame knowing that both Matthew Lillard and Freddie Prinze Jr are actually quite good actors. Usually in these reviews I’d at least mention some positive point but there is a first time for everything so yeah no redeeming qualities for this film!

Sorry for having such a short review for this instalment of Tanya Tuesdays. I highly recommend you read my Professor Layton review, it’s a much better read.

For Tanya Tuesdays this week you get two film reviews not just the one. Aren’t you lucky, lucky people. Instead of just reviewing the first Mortal Kombat film and then the second in another week I’m reviewing them together so both reviews will be relatively short so that this whole review doesn’t waffle on. Anyway on with the first film.

I actually fell asleep during this film, along for a couple of minutes because I was rudely awoken so that I wouldn’t miss anything. Surprisingly this film is miles better than the Super Mario Bros movie and Double Dragon. I’m not saying this is a good film, no not by a long shot. But its a vast improvement. The first thing I want to comment on is the music. The music is this film is actually fantastic, it’s the best thing about the film. I got really excited when the music shone through in certain parts of the film, especially during the fight scenes. You cannot deny how good the music is.

Anyway I was surprised when I watched this too see Christopher Lambert (Connor MacLeod from Highlander) in the cast. I just think he’s an exceptional actor in Highlander so that amused me for a while. The acting for some of the other actors (if you can call them such) within the film is so terrible. It really is! I just didn’t feel anything towards the characters. The fight scenes were well choreographed however anytime you saw the actors outside the confines of battle they just lacked personality.

I suppose I should mention the plot a little within this review. The story essentially is that for each generation a selection of warriors from the Earthworld must battle some warriors from the Outworld. So far The Outworld have won nine battles in a row meaning if they win this battle they can invade the Earthworld (by the way that is Earth if you had not yet realised). So the fighters within this film are Earth’s last hope.

The film had quite a good narrative for setting up the battles, it reminded me slightly of Dead or Alive. All the characters taken to an Island to battle each other. It’s so easy to set a film up that way and it works. Yet the plot appears to fail in other aspects.

So overall this film is good if your going to have to watch these films adapted from video games however, I would not recommend this as a general watch. It’s still a poor film, there is not much good to say really about this film besides the music and music cannot alone make a film.

Mortal Kombat: Annihilation Film Review

So onto the sequel, I have to be honest I ended up playing professor Layton through this film. I could not focus my attention to watching it. Sequels are traditionally not as good as the original, there are always exceptions to the case and this is not one of them. This is a terrible sequel miles worse than the original film. This film makes me appreciate the first. If you were comparing the two films on a scale this would get a 2 and the original somewhere around an 8. The difference between the films is staggering. The first film set up the opening to the sequel so we already have established where the film is going to go. Forces from the Outworld, lead by Shao Kahn, attempt to invade the Earthworld and thus the warriors from the previous film must battle the new enemies.

This film pretty much changes the entire cast which really annoyed me. I hate watching movies where a character gets played by a new actor everytime there is a new sequel. The cast within this film was just as bad as the last, no surprises there.

The story was terrible, just its hard to believe they followed up Mortal Kombat with this. Who actually thought this was a good idea. It has me totally baffled. Again there is some good music, but it doesn’t make up for how appallingly bad this film is. I’m glad I played Professor Layton through this film because I don’t think I’d be happy knowing I’d wasted over an hour on this rubbish. It seems like everything that was mediocre in the first film rather than improve it they just decided to make it worse. This film is why everyone hates sequels. Someone please bring me a good sequel, films like this make me lose hope!

If you’ve not seen this film get up walk away from the computer (or maybe not) and watch this film. Seriously I am telling you as a reviewer to watch this film. So do as I say. Now for some of you, your probably sat there wondering why I’m suggesting this but seriously this film is HILARIOUS. The Super Mario Bros (Jankel & Morton, 1993) film is actually really rubbish but it’s so bad it’s funny. If you don’t take this so seriously and don’t get your panties in a twist by the fact it ruins the Mario name it’s a funny watch. It’s by no means a good film, it’s suffers from a terrible script and narrative, the acting is terrible (this could be because of the script rather than the cast, please note the bias because I have a crush on John Leguizamo) and the effects are shameful even for a nineties film.

So maybe I ought to go into the story for those of you who didn’t watch it despite what I advised at the beginning. So the basic story develops when Luigi’s crush Daisy is kidnapped. She is taken through a wall underneath her archaeological dig site which takes her to an alternate world. So Luigi convinces his brother Mario to join him on his rescue mission. This alternate world is ruled by King Koopa, now the majority of the people in this world are evolved dinosaurs. Essentially before humans were on the Earth a meteorite came down hit the Earth wiped out most of the dinosaurs whilst moving some into an alternate world. A part of the meteorite chipped off and this was given to Daisy upon her birth. It looks like a seedy underground city, which I suppose it is. So the story is basically Mario and Luigi saving Daisy from King Koopa who wants to broken meteorite so that the human world and world of the Dinosaurs will overlap and King Koopa can become ruler of all.

See the narrative is really bad, I don’t see why they had to have such a stupid plot it’s ridiculous. Watching this film it’s even more terrible than what I’ve discussed, however it’s comic moments are genius. You can pick this film up for around 3 quid don’t bother looking on amazon, so it’s well worth those 3 quid. It’s an unforgettable film. If you have a sense of humour you will get some pretty big laughs from this film.

The effects and make-up/costume design is insanely bad. It looks like a much older film than it actually is. The film doesn’t receive any points for doing anything right or good. The film in fact only has one good point and that’s because Yoshi is in it and looks semi-cute. That’s hardly an argument for a good film. So I may be sending you mixed signals with this, I’m pointing out how terrible it is whilst saying its a brilliant watch because of how hilarious it is. Truth is I suppose the decisions down to you. Some people probably wont find this film as hilariously bad as I did but seriously I don’t expect anyone to saying this is a good film I’m trying hard to avoid saying that. But your missing out if you don’t watch this because of how bad it is. If I had to give this film a rating it’d have like a 1 star or something but still go watch it because it will keep you amused for an hour or so (just don’t spend loads on it).

Silent Hill (2006) directed by Christophe Gans is based around a woman who goes searching for her daughter after crashing just outside the town Silent Hill. Again as with my previous review I personally have not played the Silent Hill games but I remember them, albeit vaguely, from my childhood. So not much reference will be made to the games but I must add there is a clear link between the first game and the film in that a parent goes searching for their missing child in the town of Silent Hill. So it’s clear to see where it’s narrative comes from. My problem is how it gets there.

There story starts with a young girl Sharon (Jodelle Ferland) who recently started suffering from sleepwalking, which very nearly comes close to being the death of her. Her mother Rose (Radha Mitchell) concerned takes her daughter to the town of Silent Hill which her daughter often refers too. On the journey to Silent Hill, Rose trying to avoid confrontation with a police officer speeds off and shortly after a figure of a girl steps into the road causing Rose to swerve and crash. When Rose awakens she realises her daughter is missing and goes off in search of her. So whilst in search off Sharon, Rose ends up flickering between two worlds. The first which she awakens in is a ash covered abandoned town, soon after it changes to this dark more industrial world. Rose’s husband Christopher (Sean Bean), who was for some reason not included in the road trip, goes off to search for his wife. Upon approaching the road to Silent Hill he runs into some cops. The cop takes him around Silent Hill, which again looks massively different to the world his wife is stuck in. A lot of confusion is meant to take place leaving the audience wondering what the hell is going on. Unless you are clever enough to work it out. So a lot of stuff starts happening Rose and the female cop try to escape from the mutilated monsters whilst searching for Sharon. So Rose ends up at a church where the townspeople hide from the monsters that come from the dark. Some members of the town decide they want to help Rose in the search for her daughter. Eventually leading them to meet a girl who looks very similar to Sharon, Alessa. Alessa is pretty central to the story, the town of Silent Hill accused her of being a witch and thus burnt her. Unfortunately the fire got out of control and destroyed a lot of stuff. So anyway it seems the Sharon is the good representation of Alessa or something weird like that. So the towns people of Silent Hill who have been hiding within the church seek to burn Rose’s daughter Sharon, because she looks exactly like Alessa. Rose someone absorbs Alessa and goes to the church to save her daughter. I imagine its the only way Alessa could enter the church and once Alessa breaks out of Rose’s body she practically slaughters everyone. After the blood bath Rose takes Sharon home, where her husband is waiting. Unfortunately neither is aware of the others presence and Rose and Sharon are still surrounded by the fog that covered Silent Hill. So that is the story of Silent Hill. Surprisingly the story felt really long and boring. I felt that the films narrative could have been so much better if they had cut out so much boring speech. It drags the film out. Unfortunately for this type of film you do not want the story or explanations to drag on.

There are a few good points to this film, the acting wasn’t terrible which is a surprise given it’s an adaptation of a video game. The visuals were really quite amazing. I was really drawn into this as a film it was great until you reached the parts where the actors droned on and on about witches and cult rubbish. The effects where really quite good and the monsters in the film were actually quite frightening. When I first watched this film I jumped a few times. It’s nowhere near as jumpy now I’ve watched it several times but that first viewing I did genuinely get a bit jumpy at points. To fix this film I’d have cut out like half the dialogue it was totally unnecessary. I understand the directors or whoever wanted the story to be explained and clear cut but it ruined the film, big time. This film could have been a lot better than it was. It just goes to show how quickly a good idea can go bad. Shame on you scriptwriters. So I guess what I’m saying it I would recommend this film it’s worth watching but be careful that you don’t fall asleep.